Month: June 2003

Massimo had a very good night. He got lots and lots of rest. Both the morphine and the sedation helped to ensure that he got all the R&R he needed and he was bright as a button this morning when I went in. They did a chest x-ray to check that the new tracheostomy tube was correctly in place and then I got him out for a cuddle. They had weaned his ventilation down but did not put him onto CPAP until he was in my arms at around 12. Massimo coped with the change very well and although he looked wonderful the monitor was saying that his heart rate was just a little higher than normal.

At 2.30 they took him off CPAP and he is currently on a smidgen of oxygen. He is managing very well although he is working just a tiny bit harder, but nothing more than what I would have said was normal.
Continue reading “A vast improvement”

One thing I forgot to say in my last entry is that Massimo’s oxygen levels kept dropping yesterday, not for long, but he was going a little grey around the edges and the nurse was bagging him and giving him extra oxygen. This is something that happened two or three times which I witnessed, but it shows that our brains absorb more than we actually process until we are ready to accept it and deal with it. This morning when I called the unit they told me that his oxygen requirement had gone up and down during the night and it triggered the memory of yesterday. Also I was told that his breathing had become very bad again. He was recessing (breathing in hard so that his ribs show) really badly and had been most of the morning. The doctors decided to do the bronchoscopy today.
Continue reading “What a horrible, horrible day”

Sorry for the long delay since our last entry but I have been feeling very, very unsettled about Massimo’s stay in hospital, but finding it very hard to pinpoint exactly why I was so unhappy with everything.

A few things did bother me and bothered me more and more as the days have gone by. The first is that they kept taking him off CPAP even though he seemed to be working very hard with his breathing. I couldn’t understand why they appeared to be making things harder for him. I spoke to a very nice doctor today (Jonathan) who explained that as the CPAP did not appear to be helping him, it was better that he wasn’t relying on it otherwise if his breathing got any worse the only way to assist him further would be to put him on a ventilator (rather than just back onto CPAP). He was off CPAP for most of Sunday, Monday and Tuesday but every day, at some point, he would be put back onto it. Also he always seemed to be working very hard. Today he has been on CPAP all day and he had a very long cuddle with me which seems to have helped him to settle down much better. The plan is to leave him on CPAP now until Friday morning and review him then. Obviously if he starts breathing more normally they will try to take him off before then.
Continue reading “An update – finally”

Firstly, please note that he isn’t critical and nothing earth shattering has happened, however both Justin and I feel that he was better yesterday, even after he had been put back on CPAP than he was today when we went in.

At 9 am this morning he was taken off CPAP again and he was still not on CPAP when we went in this afternoon. I went in first and I thought three things when I first saw him: (1) his cradle cap on his forehead was much worse than it was yesterday – this is a very good indication of how he is, regardless of what symptoms he may or may not have (2) he was only wearing a nappy and felt slightly colder than I would have liked and (3) lastly, but most importantly, he was working very hard at his breathing.

The nurse looking after him said that he was very hot this morning and she had stripped him down, which was obviously the right thing to do, but I felt that he had cooled down enough and that with a temperature of 36ºC he could do with just a vest. I’m not entirely sure the nurse was very pleased with me. As the afternoon wore on I think I managed to ruffle her feathers even more but to me Massimo’s wellbeing is and was more important than endearing myself to his nurse.

Anyway, he was put back on CPAP at about 6 pm and it didn’t seem to make any difference at first but J said that he was much more settled by the time he left at around 7.45 pm. I think this will take a few more days to clear up and we must just hope that it doesn’t get any worse first.